My Husband Won't Sleep With Me | Paul Friedman

Are you having issues with your husband and he won't sleep with you? Watch Paul tells you about this scenario and hear some tips to restore the love in your marriage.

What we need to do is we got to be realistic and recognize that him not sleeping with you is the result of a chain of events. Some hidden, some open that have been taking place over a long
period of time to the point of where, and don't take this personally, but he's had enough. What's going on? That's what you need to be asking yourself. You got to ask yourself, why is my husband turned off by me?

What is it that I'm doing that is pushing him away to the point of where he doesn't even want to have sex with me?

Now, a lot of women wait and we get people writing in all the time to The Marriage Foundation -- it's a free service and they say, "My husband is not sleeping with me. I think he has another lover." Well, those are two blooms on the same stem but the stem goes back to the same root,
the same plant. The plant is an unhappy marriage and you're unhappy in the marriage too and you were for quite some time. But now it's manifesting maybe you're more patient and he's going, "No, I need love." He got married for two things. He wanted to be happier every day of his life and he wanted love. He wanted to feel unconditional love from his wife, from you and you're not providing that.

I get pushed back a lot of times for saying that where women say, "I do everything for him." No, obviously not for him from his point of view which is an indication that you're not recognizing
his needs. And then sometimes a woman will go, "Well, what about me?" But we're not talking
about you now. We're talking about him. You want him to sleep with you. You want him to make
love to you. You want him to tell you you're beautiful. You want him to tell you you're appreciated,
that he loves you. So we live on the surface in a cause and effect world. What are you doing that? That's not coming back and that's what you have to look at, and you have to look at it
dispassionately.

You have to stand back and do a clean evaluation. Without emotions, you have to look at and go, "Okay. Wow, I guess I'm too critical," if that's the case or, "I was or I guess I don't give him sex when he wants it," and in this world, "Oh my God, I get into all kinds of trouble," but I'm not in trouble for telling you the truth. There's supposed to be love and loyalty. That's part of your giving him sex when he wanted it. Maybe you didn't, "I have a headache." "I work too hard." "I'm
tired too." "You're not picking a good time." Who knows? Because usually, that's how a man knows that you love him because you're ready to have sex with him whenever he wants and I know in this world that's like almost preposterous but it's realistic if you want a happy marriage.
You don't have to look for a balance.

I'm merely sharing with you why a man married you not for the sex. For unconditional love he married you, to be happy. What makes him happy? Compliments, support, letting him know he's terrific that makes him happy. What's a way of him feeling that you love him unconditionally?
Every time he wants sex you're right there. Then he knows. Now obviously, that can be modified to a degree and it always has to be. Well, 99% of the time it has to be somewhat modified
because circumstances don't always allow for it but your intention so there's a lot of reasons.

Now you can't just jump over and go, "Honey, I'm ready to have sex with you." Obviously, he's
past that. So now you have to rebuild your marriage incrementally step by step and you don't want to do this on your own. Use one of my books or the course. You got to be clear about what will work. You can't just do what you think will work because obviously, you didn't know what will work or you wouldn't be in this jam but that's the problem. It's not that he won't sleep with you
that's not the problem. That's the bloom. The problem is that the marriage isn't cool. It's not working. Get real about it. Heal it correctly, don't just wing it. I really hope this was helpful for you.

I hope it's given you something to think about and I don't mean to be calling me a misogynist thinking about it because I'm not but I'm realistic about what marriage is all about and if it were your husband looking sometimes those videos are tough on your husband, on the men because I like to be candid with people. I want them to succeed. I want you to succeed. I don't want you to be feeling like I made you feel good. I want you to do the work. There's work involved now
and I want you to do that work so you can gain from your marriage that which marriage produces like crazy, love, and happiness. There is no better vehicle.

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